Something Better?
Dec 17, 2018
Parents, do you feel you keep encountering the same struggles time and time again? Let me help you stop this cycle!
Punishment, Reward, or Something Better?
Punishment makes children feel worse. It doesn’t help them develop into their best self. It doesn’t help them with accountability, responsibility, or problem-solving skills.
They may temporarily do better out of compliance or fear, but, quickly we realize the “good” behavior won’t last. This is because children aren’t learning the WHY behind the rationale of our punishments. Children will continue the “bad” behavior, do it covertly, or possibly stop out of fear, but not because they learned the lesson behind the punishment.
Do we really want our children to be sneaky or fear us?
Rewarding our children teaches them to expect something for “good” behavior. They still won’t learn the value of whatever life lesson we are trying to teach them. Take chores for example… if we give our children money for keeping up with basic household duties, are they learning the value of personal responsibility, self care, and the satisfaction of taking care of their home?
Do we want our children to expect something for everything we ask them to do? No, that’s called entitlement.
Maybe it’s time for a new strategy…
By showing our children appreciation and encouragement, we are able to teach them life lessons, and develop their internal compass to be competent in life. By taking the time to explain the WHY behind our rationale, we are teaching them the life skill of communication, we are connecting with them more deeply, and we are widening their lens of possibility thinking. Encouraging and Appreciating our children ultimately gives them a better sense of self-worth, and the ability to develop into their best self!
